Diary of a Ground Hopper: Albion Rovers 0-0 Bo’ness United

SATURDAY, MARCH 15

Albion Rovers vs Bo’ness United

A very early start is needed to get to Scotland for an 11.00am kick-off at Harthill Royal in the East of Scotland League.

It’s the first of four games – and new grounds – today on the annual Groundhop north of the border.

I confess that I am not an early morning person, but what the pre-dawn rise does mean is that I am on the M6 and M74 delighting in the Lake District and the Lowther Hills covered in frost on a glorious morning.

After three variable matches, it is soon time for the one I’ve really been waiting for: Albion Rovers of the Lowland League.

Arrival

By all accounts, their Cliftonhill Stadium in Coatbridge is a wonderful place.

The third game of the day was at Bathgate Thistle, kicking off at 4.30pm.

This doesn’t leave a vast amount of time to head along the M8 for 7.45pm.

It is at this precise moment that Jane SatNav decides to throw one of her rare tantrums: she really doesn’t like new road layouts.

I really must get the Old Lass updated!

Anyway, after giving Jane a good talking to, I eventually see Cliftonhill’s wonderful old floodlights loom into view.

The ground

The entrance to the ground is up an incline on a wide concourse.

One or two Groundhoppers are complaining about officious stewarding, but I breeze through with my pre-paid GroundHop UK ticket (usual price is £11 to get in). T

onight’s programme costs £2.50

After climbing some steps, I pause to look at the memorial garden, remembering Albion Rovers’ players killed in action in WW1, which is a nice touch.

Further on up, I clap eyes on the 100-plus-years-old stadium.

What a dream venue!

I emerge by the side of an old grandstand painted in orange/red and yellow – the colours of Albion’s striking kit.

Across the pitch is a fantastic, covered terrace.

I start to head over there but then realise it is devoid of people: unfortunately, closed to the public!

Food

I join the melee for teamsheets, club merchandise and food in a tiny hut at the side of the stand.

I eventually bag a teamsheet (50p) but give up on the food.

I set off on my semi-circuit of the stadium and discover another teahut at the other end of the grandstand.

I don’t really fancy my third pie of the day but then spot a large saucepan on the hob: soup!

The lentil soup is so tasty, I return for TWO (count ‘em!) more cups (and even manage to blag a crusty roll to go with them).

I wait for the steaming hot broth to cool down while ogling the closed stand.

The match

The match gets progressively worse and I am soon admiring the huge, orange moon while catching up with Lord Swan and various Groundhoppers.

At half time, the winner of the 50-50 draw donates his £220 quid back to the struggling club.

I spend the next ten minutes asking myself if I would have done the same and, to my shame (call yourself a socialist, I hear Lord Swan asking!), cannot come up with a definitive answer!

On the long, drive home, I ask myself whether the scrumptious old ground made up for the appalling match and a ‘double doughnut’.

Yes, but only just!

The ratings and attendance

Pre-match info: 9, Welcome: 6, Facilities: 7, Food: 7, Charm: 10, Programme: 8, Match: 3, Overall Trip: 9, Officials: 9, Attendance: 379

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