SATURDAY, JANUARY 7TH HEYBRIDGE SWIFTS 5 BASILDON UNITED 1

BECAUSE The Fox hasn’t got use of his car on a Saturday, he comes up with a cunning plan whereby I drop him at Chelmsford and carry on to Heybridge Swifts half an hour away.
After hurling The Fox out of the moving Hoppermobile at The Melbourne Stadium, I make my way along the collapsing roads of Essex.
I take a peek in the club car park and decide it looks like the sort of place one might easily become blocked in so I park considerately on a nearby side road instead.
It is here I bump into Happy Hopper, taking advanta...